Essays & Confessions

How I Finally Learned To Get Rid Of All The Clothes That Didn’t Fit Me

By Thursday, August 16, 2018

You know the running joke how about how women are always complaining to a friend or partner about how they don’t have anything to wear even though have a closet filled with clothes at their disposal? Well, sometimes they are actually telling the truth. I sure was. For years, most of the garments I owned were far too small for me. I’m talking pants that wouldn’t go past my thighs, tops that didn’t fully cover my stomach, and dresses that made me feel like I was suffocating. You’re probably wondering why someone would do that to themselves instead of just getting clothes that actually fit them. For one thing, years 0f terrible self-esteem. Also, I truly believed one day I’d be able to wear those clothes again, so why bother spending money replacing things?

Before I get ahead of myself, let me explain where such terrible thinking came from in the first place. Between my first and second year of college, I put on a significant amount of weight — even more than the freshman 15. As a result, most of my old stuff was way too small for my new shape. Instead of discarding the items and updating my wardrobe, though, I held onto them for months, all because I was in deep denial about the weight gain. Thankfully, I eventually came to my senses and realized I couldn’t continue living like that — it was causing me a lot of emotional pain.

On my journey to self-acceptance, these three things helped me accept my new body.

1. I sought out companies that make awesome clothes for larger body types.

ASOS, Boohoo, ModCloth — I love these lines so so much. Not only do they make a point to carry a wide range of sizes for an array of figures, their plus-size offerings are just as great as their straight sizes and they are affordable. For so long, plus-size consumers were stuck with bottom-of-the-barrel designs. It was truly pathetic. Now, thanks to said brands and others like Eloquii, we have far chicer choices to choose from at different price points. I’m glad I made a point to find them, as they made me rediscover my love of fashion. Gone are the days where I squeeze myself into something because I don’t have any other options. 

2. I surrounded myself with positive influences.

I went to a high school where your image was everything. As a fashion design student, I was constantly judged by my peers for my ability to create beautiful clothes and how I dressed. “How can you expect people to buy your clothes when you have your own fashion line if you don’t look fashion-forward?” Consequentially, I spent a lot of time getting dressed, carefully picking out outfits that would impress the other students and prove my worth. I didn’t realize it until recently, but that time period really impacted the way I approached fashion. By the time I got to college, that mindset of dressing for others was ingrained in me. Luckily, I was able to break out of that cycle by surrounding myself with people who never ever judged me by how I looked. I also made a conscious effort to fill my Instagram feed with body positive influencers who look like me, instead of the slender types I was used to seeing. 

3. I sorted out my emotional trauma.

I’m going to be honest: putting on a considerable amount of weight in a short time frame does a number on your psyche. All of a sudden, you’re faced with an entirely new body and a well of emotions — with no handbook on how to deal with them. Thankfully, I had the means to go through months and months of therapy that helped me unpack my feelings towards my physical appearance and the changes it went through in college. Additionally, I started meeting up with a local food addicts anonymous group, per my therapist’s suggestion. It was a moving experience that opened up my eyes to just how much I relied on food as an emotional salve.


Ultimately, my relationship to my body still has its ups and downs. There are times where I can’t stop staring in awe at the reflection in the mirror and other times I run away from it in horror. Thankfully, these days, the former happens way more frequently than the latter — all thanks to these strategies I’ve employed. And now that I’m far happier with myself, it’s become much easier to get rid of clothes that don’t serve me. I no longer aspire to be who I once was because I’m comfortable with who I am today. 

Shammara is the editorial assistant at The Financial Diet. When she’s not copy-editing or writing about her financial woes, you can find her on Twitter sharing her thoughts on beauty and fashion trends and pop culture.

Image via Pexels

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